Is Being Shy the Same as Being an Introvert?
It is a common misconception that all introverts are shy; however, being introverted does not automatically mean that you are shy. In fact, there are 2 widely-know categories of introverts: Type A introverts that are more well-adjusted socially, and Type B introverts who are shy and withdrawn in social situations.
What Do “Introvert” and “Shy” Mean?
According to Merriam-Webster, the term introvert was introduced in the early 1900s to describe personality types that focus a person’s energy on the inner world, as in one’s own feelings, emotions, and thoughts. Introverts tend to prefer alone time or socializing with one or a few people at a time.
Also according the Merriam-Webster, the term shy means timid, or easily frightened.
Extroverted and introverted are more static qualities of a person even though they exist on a spectrum too, and shyness is more temporary and dynamic in that it can change more readily if you work on it. For instance, you probably won’t force a more introverted person to love going clubbing every weekend, but you can help them to work on social skills that will make them less shy around people.
Although people tend to use the term “introvert” to mean “shy” in today’s age, I know plenty of people who would qualify themselves as introverted, but they are not shy as in “easily frightened by people,” and in fact they can be quite sociable when they want to be. They just prefer to do more quiet activities with smaller groups of people instead of larger crowds with lots of activity.
The Difference Between Type A and Type B Introversion
In the academic journal Introversion: A misunderstood "individual difference" among students, written by the late Dr. Arnold Henjum, Henjum defines two broad categories of introverts including “those who are self-sufficient, confident and self-actualizing (Type A), and those who are shy, withdrawn and who have a low self-concept (Type B).” While there are a wide variety of individual factors contributing to people with introverted personalities, his findings in educational studies of introverted students show us that it’s possible for introverts to be socially well-adjusted, just like it’s possible for them to be shy and timid.
You’ll also find that there are 4 more specific categories of introverts as studied by psychologists at Wellesley College, including social introverts, thinking introverts, anxious introverts, and inhibited introverts.
From these findings and from a wide variety of personal experiences that you can find on Quora, Reddit, and other forums about the differences between introversion and shyness, here are some of the key points about introversion and shyness:
Not all introverts are shy, but some are.
Just like it’s possible for introverts to not be shy, as in they are more introspective but are not afraid of socially interacting with people, it’s possible and even common for introverts to be shy, as in they are more introspective and they are also timid around people.
It’s possible for shy introverts to build up their social skills.
Before I built up my confidence and self-esteem as an introvert, I used to be very shy; in fact, when I was in my teens, I was so shy that I would cling to my mom for dear life whenever people wanted to talk to me, so you can imagine how shy I was without my parents around. I would later find out that I was only so shy because I wasn’t confident in my own value as an introverted person, and I was surrounded by extroverted people who I just didn’t fit in with, but once I learned that I did have something valuable to offer, even with my quiet, introspective ways, I was no longer afraid of being rejected by people, and therefore I was no longer afraid of socializing with them. If that sounds like what you’re going through, you might enjoy reading my article How to Overcome Shyness as an Adult.
Whatever the reason for your shyness, shy introverts can overcome their timidness and fear of socializing with some practice.
It’s possible to be extroverted and shy.
Although it’s more uncommon, it’s possible in certain situations to have an extroverted personality as in outgoing and sociable, but be timid around certain people.
For instance, say you have the personality that wants to go out and meet people, but because of some major rejection or social trauma that you’ve faced in the past, you are more shy than you’d like to be. That’s one scenario where you can be extroverted and shy simultaneously.
What if I Am Shy and Introverted?
If you’re anything like I used to be, you might have come to the conclusion by this point in the article that you are a shy introvert. If that sounds like you, don’t worry; all is not lost. I used to be an extremely shy and socially awkward introvert before I did the mental and emotional work to become a socially confident introvert, and if I can do, so can you.
What I’ve discovered in my own life as well as the lives of introverted misfits in this community is that shy introverts are often shy because of slightly different reasons than the reasons of more shy extroverts.
Shy introverts often:
Might be shy for reasons independent of their introverted personality
Lack confidence in their introverted personality
Have been socially rejected by more extroverted people in the past, or by people who generally don’t appreciate a more introspective nature
Don’t know what their introverted qualities have to offer the world
If you’re a shy, socially awkward introvert, I hope you won’t leave my site without your FREE Quickstart to Becoming a Socially Confident Introvert; it’s your first step to becoming a less shy and socially awkward version of yourself!
What are your thoughts? Have you ever been mistaken as shy even though you’re just an introvert, or vice versa? Let me know; I love hearing stories from you!
